Self confidence is something I think I have always struggled with from a young age and I know it is really not just me who lacks the umph! I think on meeting me you would think that I was quite a confident person but behind closed doors and away from faces I’m really not and if you follow my blog you will know I am a massive worrier (so nearly typed warrior!! Haha I wish!). I think when you doubt yourself you become good at putting on a front as if all is fine. But there are so many things I can feel self conscious about from anything small such as going somewhere new or wearing a different kind of t-shirt I’ve very often felt unconfident about the way I look or am being presented. I even had a melt down before graduation because I was worried about how I was going to be seen and judged by people.
Even now as a 20/21 year old I hear people telling me to be more confident in myself from applying to jobs I don’t think I am qualified for to my dancing. I have often been told by teachers at school or university that I just need to believe in myself but I have no clue what I am actually capable of to believe in myself?? I know I will never be the best at anything as there is always someone better, bigger or stronger then you just around the corner, but maybe I just don’t rate myself highly enough? But then again on the other hand I don’t want to seem big headed? because I think there is a thin line between being confident and big headedness and I know which one I would rather be! You often see confident people and think they are a bit of a dick because they are so sure about themselves and nobody want’s people to think that of them!!
Maybe self confidence is just the art of making other people believe you know what your doing (without being a dick)! I think I need to majorly work on this asap!!
Thanks for reading another brain fart blog post! Soon I think I’m going to have to make a section for brain fart posts there are so so many!!
Little Mayfly x